Tempers were high on Saturday when a Dzivarasekwa man caught his wife in bed with his brother. Tyson, 31, could not believe his eyes when he returned home early from a weekend church outing. He found his wife Chenai, 26, and his older brother, Tinashe, 34, playing games in their matrimonial bed. The police had to be called in to rescue Chenai from her fuming husband, who proved to be well-versed in the art of boxing. Tinashe, full of shame, was happy to see the police after being on the receiving end of an angry crowd.
Tyson had been on a weekend-long church trip when he decided to return home early because he was feeling unwell. He had no idea of what awaited him at home, and he would soon find out. Tyson could tell someone was with his wife as soon as he entered his four-roomed house. Shocked and angry, he decided to wait for the lovers to finish enjoying the forbidden fruit, but he could not wait for long. He burst into the room only to discover the shock of his life. His own brother was standing stark naked with his wife. A struggle ensured as Tyson quickly attacked the two lovebirds. Chenai screamed repeatedly, alerting neighbors.
Neighbors and passersby rushed into the yard and quickly reprimanded Tinashe, while Tyson berated his screaming wife. “I didn’t know you were coming today. I’m sorry,” she cried. “She is lying. He needs to beat her. She is always bringing men here,” said a woman claiming to be the couple’s neighbor. Tyson’s temper was at boiling point when this reporter interviewed him. “I knew something was going on! Last time I caught them kissing and he said he was drunk. I forgave them, and now this,” he said. “And he has the guts to come here wearing the shirt I bought him,” he continued.
The crowd that had been treated to a small drama finally dissipated, leaving behind a distraught Chenai packing her bags. Tyson, a respected member of the community, vowed not to talk to his brother again. His brother seemed to have taken the saying “what’s yours is mine” a little too seriously.
I am always fascinated by Zimbabwean tabloid newspapers. They are quite different from most popular tabloids from countries such as the US. While they do contain celebrity gossip, their hallmark is something else. They usually carry incredibly sensational stories about unknown people. It’s the content, rather than the actual people, that makes the stories. The simple header “Is Kim Kardashian pregnant?” may be able to grab the attention of American tabloid readers, but something different is needed in Zimbabwe. “Man Cheats on Wife – with a Goat” is more suitable for a Zimbabwean audience. The language tends to be different too. One is more likely to read the sentence, “A David-and-Goliath boxing match soon ensued,” than the sentence “The two mismatched men began to fight.” The overall result is a very funny, hardly believable story about some unknown people from some place in the country. They are usually very funny reads.
Now, I leave it up to you to decide whether the above tabloid story is true or not.
Here is a great example: Woman Caught in Bed with Hubby’s Cousin